Friday, April 30, 2010

The pains of changing your name !

Ok, so I just got our marriage license back- now the hastle of getting married starts..."The name change". It's bad enough women have to have babies, have a monthly period, remember everything, cook, clean, now this too. So first things first, I will start today with heading to the social security office to get my name changed there. Do I go with first- middle -new last, first -old last -new last, OR since I actually go by my middle name should I drop my first or switch them around? So many decisions...geez! Well, to be honest I needed to go to the social security office anyways. I guess they have me listed under the wrong D.O.B. anyways. They show me a year older and I haven't been able to e-file my tax returns for the past 3 years because of it. Yes, I know, I have known for 3 years and haven't done anything about it. It is terrible, I know! I was going to do it last year, then time flew and I got engaged so I decided to wait and do it all at once. So, today I will go there. It is in the slum areas of Atlanta and takes forever, so I think I will have Allan go with me. That is the least he can do, right?!

Then, after I do that I have to go to the DMV and get a new license. Oh joy! I mean I am not looking forward to this because my current license still has my picture and WEIGHT (LOL) from freshman year in college....time to update that I guess. Oh, and the address is from like 5 or 6 homes know when you are in college you go from apartment to apartment, so it is not completely unreasonable, right?

Then, I have to mail in all the stuff to update my passport. There are ups and downs to this. My current picture sucks, so that is ok, but I am going to loose all my stamps :( and $100.

After that, I have to alert voter registeration...I guess since Obama is only a year in I have a couple years to put this one off, right?! Just kidding people, take it easy.

After those things, I have to update my banking info, order new checks, change my credit card, update my 401k, stocks, mortgage company, utilities, and check my credit report.

Then, there are all the other things like facebook account, email addresses, HR stuff at work, insurance policies, gym memberships, alumni organizations and more...OMG WHO thinks of all this stuff??? I am going to be doing this crap for the rest of the year!

Ok, so here is my recommendation to all newlywed women out there. We all know marriage is work and every day you have to work at it to make it last. Work people, make it last- can you imagine getting divorced and having to switch all this crap back, heck no!!!

AL, honey, I think I will deserve a spa day after all this is complete :)

Thursday, April 29, 2010

7 Mistakes Newlyweds make...

Ok, so while I will continue to post some random things, I have decided to kind of go with the them of my life as a newlywed and of course progress as life goes on. So...that being said, do any of you visit It is a great website. I was reading an article about the 7 mistakes even the smartest couples make and wanted to share it.

Mistake #1: Not Dealing With Debt
Newsflash: Money is the #1 thing couples fight about. Fess up about your personal debt -- because for better or worse -- and then set up a financial game plan with our budgeter. - this is so true, see Allan and I both put it right out there in the open at the begining. Yes, I have student loans and he had a bit of credit card debt that we have managed to whittle down. We both saw eachother's credit scores and knew exactly what we were getting into.

Mistake #2: Alienating Your Friends
Friends are key for a successful marriage, so tag along on those girls' nights out. Just because you're not guy-hunting doesn't mean you can't be a supportive wingwoman.- Completely agree, most of our friends are either married or in serious relationships, so a lot of times we all go out together which is great too!

Mistake #3: Not Having Enough Sex
Over 60 percent of newlyweds we surveyed were already in a sex rut! Yeah, you're busy, but that's not a good enough excuse not to get busy. Initiate sex, even if you don't feel like it or have to schedule it. If you get in the habit of having it, you'll start wanting it (and liking it) more. - This is so true, you have got to keep the relationship strong and this connection is important.

Mistake #4: Letting Yourself Go
So you put on the "newlywed nine." Big've already found your mate, right? Wrong! Make a plan to get fit together or at least respect each other's goals. - Again, I agree. Allan and I definitely put on some pounds when we first met, and we recently started getting much better about hitting the gym. This was something I did religously before we met and something that makes me feel less stressed and healthier. I mean we both like to eat, so we need to work out. And people who let themselves go are asking for trouble. Yes, you love eachother for what's inside and you should stick together through thick and thin (literally), but attraction is a part of a relationship wether people want to admit it or not. Help your partner, I don't ever want to get too heavy, so I have told Allan if I ever start getting over a certain weight, take the food out of my mouth, and on days where he doesn't really want to go to the gym I tell him, "c'mon, it is only an hour and we are done." Motivate Eachother!

Mistake #5: Outlawing the In-Laws
Fifty percent of couples we surveyed have a problematic relationship with their in-laws (ya think?). Manage expectations, like saying you'll call on Sundays so his mom doesn't guilt-trip you for ignoring her weekday messages. Even if your spouse is bitching about his family, resist the urge to chime in. It'll bite you in the butt later. A lot of couples have this problem. Allan and I both put eachother first over everyone else, including our parents so we are dealing with this fine (for now), but we do make efforts to call his parents at least once a week because they live far away and we try to make sure we see both my families a couple times a month as well, so far so good. I think as long as you put eachother as #1, it will be fine.

Mistake #6: Crazy Fighting
Getting hitched isn't a free pass to hit below the belt (sorry!). When you're getting really heated, walk away to cool down for a few minutes. Lately, we have struggled with this. All the stress of work, planning a wedding, etc. have made us both a little moody and we have said things we don't mean. We try not to do it and need to do better, but sometimes it does happen. Stop and think before you say something, you never know how it will hurt your partner.

Mistake #7: Becoming Baby-Obsessed
It's easy to fixate on that next big step, but chill out -- the average couple has a kid within three years of marriage. So really, why rush? Savor the moments (and vacations you can take!) now...when you won't have to be waking up for a brutal 4 a.m. feeding. Well, this may be a mistake we are making. We are not obsessed, not visiting a doctor or worrying yet, but we are ready when it happens and will be super excited. We have family close by and we are not afraid of leaving our baby with a sitter, so we have made a promise that we will continue to make time to travel and that we will make time for eachother. Some people are probably saying, "yeah right, dream on", but you know that is them and this is us and we will do what we say and everything will be fine. :)

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Our love story: The proposal

It was Friday, June 5th, 2009 and we were planning to have "date night". Usually Allan plans date night and I don't really have any idea what the plan is. Well, this particular Friday was the same except I was very moody and sensitive, lol, go figure. At work he had roses delivered to me, 11 beautiful red roses. Yes, 11, I think his friend who delivered them took one to give to some girl at work, lol. I know who counts, right- well I do, haha.

After work we went down the street to start our evening at a place called Stats. This is the place Allan and I had our second after work hang out and the first time we felt sparks was here as well. We went to the roofop and had a couple of drinks and he gave me a gift. It was a charm bracelet with a little apple on it. I thought awww ok, this is sweet, I already have a charm bracelet, but thank you honey. Yes, I was being quite the biatch... I know! But really, the bracelet was beautiful and charm was too cute, for those of you who don't know, we always call eachother the "apple of our eye". So next, we went to dinner at this yummy restaurant called Chow Baby. This is where we had our first official date! He didn't give me anything here, we just had a nice dinner and left for our next destination....Ten Pin Alley- an upscale bowling alley/bar located in Atlanta. This was our second destination on our first date and the place where I got his car towed (haha, yes, I got his car towed on our first date, it was an accident!). Here he gave me another charm for my new bracelet. It was a C. I thought, ok, this is cute...BOTH our last names started with C, so I wasn't suspicious yet, but I do remember telling him "Wow, this is really romantic going on all of our firsts, you should have saved this idea for when you propose". So after this, we left and headed towards home. I was still in a bad mood, so we got home and I went upstairs to lay down. On my way up he asked me to come outside for a minute, I was being mean and was like "no, no, I am just going to go lay down". He asked me a few more times and so I finally went. When I got out there he told me to close my eyes and he started telling me how much he loved me and how much I meant to him...this is when I knew and I got sooo nervous and anxious that I don't even remember what he was saying, he said he had 1 more charm and he wanted me to guess what it was by feeling it. I guessed a dog bone! hahaha, it was a little bar and engraved on it was W.Y.M.M. soon as I saw it, I knew! I started smiling from ear to ear and crying and he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him....of course I said yes. So, we ended up getting engaged under the stars on the back patio, exactly like the evening we shared our first kiss! It was perfect in every way and I will never ever forget it! Love you pumpkin!


So, today my husband and I have been married for 18 days, seems like nothing, but it has flown by. Our wedding was the happiest day of our lives, it was so much fun and we will remember it always. We got married in Key Largo, we never even went down to see the resort prior to the wedding and I did all the planning myself- basically using google. Google and are the best!

I feel so lucky to have found Allan, he is truely an amazing man. I know I "man bash" him a lot, but I think that is normal, I mean what woman doesn't? But...I do appreciate him and I love him so incredibly much. He has a huge, huge heart and always tries to do his best at whatever he does- wether it be being a friend, a husband, or at work, everything- he puts is all into it! He is very handy around the house, which is great, because I could not imagine spending the rest of my life with a man who isn't. He is extremely intelligent and that is super sexxxy. He is such a good daddy to our baby boston terriers and so much more.

Every morning that I wake up with our little family in tact, I feel so blessed! I know we have only been married for 18 days, but I am looking forward to spending a lifetime together. Everyone out there take today to focus on the people in your life who mean the most to you, why do you love them? Tell them...and always remember to count your blessings.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Hello world!

Hello world and welcome to my blog, I hope you like it and become a follower!

[caption id="attachment_3" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Me and my pups!"][/caption]