Wednesday, October 23, 2013

What's Your Excuse ?? ...(not to read this)

Ok, so I have been contemplating on wether or not to write about this, but there are so many people talking about it and it does hit close to home with me so I feel like I have to...and I am going to warn you this is going to get long.

There are always going to be people who judge you, people for judging you for taking this time to yourself. People who judge you for the way you dress your kids, what you feed your kids, what you look like, where you shop, what kind of car you drive, if you breast feed or formula feed and so on and so on, but when people get nasty, that's a problem.

Maria Kang is the mom of three, approximate ages of her kids are 3, 2 and 10 months, who posted a picture on her facebook page of herself in workout gear with her kids and the message, "What's Your Excuse?". Keep in mind her facebook page is a page promoting her FITNESS blog. Her whole page is about fitness people! So after posting this picture, people ripped her a new one! People are calling her a bully, saying she doesn't spend enough time with her family, saying she is a disgrace to mother's, insinuating that she doesn't take care of her children or work and that her stunning figure is all due to genetics. Oh my gosh people, you are ridiculous, I can't even begin to describe how ridiculous you are.

Personally, I am a mom who works full time, who takes care of my household, my family including my husband and most definitely my children, but I also try to take care of myself like Maria Kang. Sometimes I struggle with my fitness, I eat my fair share of "terrible for you" food and that I continue to struggle with. I do however enjoy getting my workout time in. After Gianna I struggled with committing enough "me time" at the gym, rather rushing home after work to spend time with her. I committed to myself that after Miles I would do better at this, making sure I get that time in, because a happy and healthy mommy equals a happy and healthy family and to be able to instill these healthy habits and lifestyle on my children is so valuable.

I have done a pretty good job since returning to work. I have my routine down. Monday & Tuesdays are my free cardio days. Walking or running either outside with the kids in stroller, at the gym or at home on the treadmill. Wednesday's are bike class day and I usually bring Gianna to play at Kidsplex while I spin! Thursday is all about Hot Yoga! Miles and Gianna come with Allan and I on Thursday's. Friday is off and Saturday or Sunday I like to get a long run in by myself to reflect. Have I missed a class here or there, because of the fair or a sick child? Sure, but overall I am committing myself to maintaining this schedule. Why? Because I enjoy it, it keeps me sane, it keeps me fit, it keeps me healthy and happy!

Will I ever look like Maria Kang? Hell no! She looks amazing!!! I can dream of looking like that, but probably never will. Why? Because one, I am not ready to commit to the healthy eating that she has adopted. I wish I could, it is my weakness, I hope to improve on it, but being honest, I don't ever plan to completely give up french fries or ice cream, even for a week. Two, I probably don't put in the same amount of gym time. I am good with 30 minutes to an hour, but I do put in some time and for me, that is my goal (for now). You get what you put in people. Maria Kang puts in a lot! As she states on her blog, she is the physical result of "dedication, discipline and desire." Do genetics play a role in fitness? Of course they do, but that is definitely not the only factor or the biggest factor!

As women we are constantly comparing ourselves to others. What cars we drive, what clothes we wear, our purses, our children's milestones, the parties we throw, our marriages, it is constant and never ending and yes it is sad, very sad. I read this quote on Maria Kang's website and I love it, "Comparison is the thief of Joy." This is so very true! Maria Kang puts a ton of work into looking the way she does, she works hard at it, but in no way what so ever is her clean eating or working out a factor in her mothering. Just because she is a super fit mom and wife doesn't mean she isn't excelling in those other aspects of her life as well. Every one of us is different, we have different jobs, have different salaries, have different life styles, have different goals, have different struggles and so on.

Some of us struggle paying the bills. Others have worked super hard and can take their kids on extravagant vacations or buy them very expensive clothing. Does this mean the ones who are struggling didn't work hard? No of course not, they may have gotten laid off or have a different struggle, but it shouldn't lessen the ones who are doing well and want to provide these things for their children. Some people come from money, great, jealous? Yeah maybe a little, but hey, lucky them! Some of us chose to stay home with our kids. Some chose to work for reasons other than to pay our bills. Some work to pay bills. Some of us drive fancy cars. Some of us are super hot after having kids like Maria Kang, some of us struggle with our weight. Some of us are naturally skinny (and lucky). Some are average and overall ok with that. We are all different people! Can you admire Maria Kang for looking the way she does? Hell yeah! But why, oh why must you bash her.

We have all felt jealousy, I have felt it, I know what it feels like. I have felt it for the people who come from "family money" and have it all. I have felt jealous of the naturally skinny mommies who bounce right back after having babies or the women who can get pregnant after 1 month of trying while I had to do IVF, pay a fortune and take shots every day to get knocked up. Yes, we have all been there, it is a normal emotion, but instead of publicly bashing another person you should really tap into those emotions. Obviously, there is a deeper issue there. Maybe if you feel so much anger over Maria Kang's picture you are struggling with your own self body image. I mean hell, aren't we all?! I know I do, but I am smart enough to know that what I put in is what I get out. If I want to look better, I need to put in more work wether it be healthy eating or time in the gym.

So if there is something about yourself that you are unhappy with, work on it, decide if you are willing to "pay the cost" to get the result, whatever that may be. If not, don't hate on other people for having a different lifestyle or body or whatever it may be! Hater-aid anyone?? (LOL)


  1. I wasn't familiar with this story--I think I might live under a rock---but I really love your message here. There's enough judgment in the world--we need to cut one another some slack. Preach on!

  2. amen.
    i couldnt believe that so many people harped on her - and for the things they did. at first i thought the huge deal would be the pressure that there is on new moms to get their body back and look that great but ay yi yi! the judging moments in the mom community have got to stop! women need to empower one another!
    great post girl!